Thursday, June 29
There is no such thing as a power struggle in a Godly marriage. Ephesians 5:23 states that the husband is the head of the wife. I get the feeling that some women have a hard time agreeing with that these days. They aren’t going to let their husband tell them what to do. I am convinced that the reason God put man in charge has not changed through the years and this rule still applies today. Why would God have the man and woman become one in marriage, but then tell the woman to submit to the man?
I think God was trying to keep harmony in the marriage. Think about a church board that had two people on it and they both got one vote. In other words, neither one had more power than the other. What would happen if they disagree on something? Perhaps they could compromise or one could give in to the other, but I suspect if they both had very strong opinions, they may not be able to come to a resolution. It would probably not end well. I am not sure, but I suspect this could be the reason we no longer have Simon and Garfunkel. What a shame.
The husband is the head of the wife, but it is important to look at the whole picture. God is in charge of everything and Jesus is next in line, above man. Man is number three. The man has been given orders on how to be a leader. He doesn’t get to make all of the decisions. Many of the important decisions have already been made for him and he just needs to carry them out. Think of God as the owner of a store, Jesus as the manager of the whole store, and man as the department manager of one of the departments in the store. The owner gets to do whatever he wants to do with the store. The store manager follows the directions from the owner and makes sure all of the department managers are doing what they are supposed to do. The department managers get to make some decisions within their area, but they must follow the directions from the owner and store manager. Man does not have the freedom to do whatever he wants; he must follow the directions from God and Jesus.
Wives need to submit to their husbands, but Ephesians 5:25 tells husbands that they need to love their wives. Verse 28 clarifies it even more by saying husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies. We all have selfish tendencies so we all know what it is like to want to make our own lives as good as possible. A massage feels awesome, certain foods taste wonderful, and eight hours of sleep feels great. In the same way that we desire these good things for ourselves, men need to make sure that they are supplying this level of love to their wives. They need to constantly be aware of their wives’ needs and fulfill those needs with the same vigor they would use to take care of their own needs. In fact, they will need to sacrifice their time and energy to love their wives the way they should be loved.
Men, it is true that you have been given the power to make decisions in your marriage, but I suspect some men abuse their power and use it to keep their women down. They enjoy being in charge and they make sure their women know that they are in charge. They use that power to make their own lives better, rather than loving their wives the way they should be loved. Ephesians 5:26-27 explains what men should do with their power. He should present her in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she should be holy and blameless. In other words, he needs to use his power to lift her up, not keep her down. He needs to invest in her life to make her the most she can be.
The struggle is NOT real as long as wives submit to their husbands and husbands love their wives.